An Admission

"You're so serene!"

"Wow, fifteen? I thought you were way older!"

"I don't know how you manage to hold up so well. I'm terrified!"

"You are such a *wise* person."

People say these kinds of things to me a lot, and even though I know I should feel complimented, I rarely do, because what they see is *not* what I am. Honestly? I'm quiet around people most of the time because I'm shy, and scared. No other reason. Believe me, I know several people who will assure you that I am *far* from being serene.

I don't hold up well in frightening circumstances, even though people sometimes think that. I freeze, like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming car, and retreat far, far back into my own mind, until all that people see is the unmoving shell in which I hide. I am not wise, or serene, or well put together. I. Am. Scared.

LookHere

AndHere