Gender Fuck

what does it mean to fuck with your gender? what does genderfuck mean to you? what ways does society and your friends and parents support or reject the ways you fuck with gender roles, or, hell, gender period? what does gender mean? what makes a female a female or a male a male? what about transsexuality?

The woman part of me is there, as present as ever. I love the curves, the blood, the energy, the voice, the hips, the conversations and understandings that are granted me as part of the baggage I carry through this life. But I got called "Sir" three times last week. And it Thrilled Me To Bits. And come to think of it, no one called me "Maam". I am not in crisis over my identity. I know my gender preference as relates to myself, my sexual preferences as relate to others. I "try to pass" only when it is safest to be perceved as male. But I like screwing with the heads of people who look at me on the street. I believe that in our modern way of ridged definition of gender, that a "manly" woman walking down the street is another small step towards everyone's mental freedom. I don't know how to thank Leslie Feinburg for hir insight on this topic, or Alix Olson for letting me know that it's somthing that can be mentioned outloud and amplifyed.

I dont get it

I'm a good liberal child of hippies. I try to accept everyone, but i dont get it. Im still a Farmers Daughter, even if he was a Hippy.

Boys are boys.

Girls are Girls.

Boys have a Penis, Girls have a Vagina, and thats how you tell them apart.

I watch my friends struggle with gender issues. I want to help and understand, and i am getting better... But sometimes still sticks in my throat.

I am a Woman. That means i wear a skirt, a bathing suit, nothing at all, tight jeans. It means i dance, split wood on my knees, hammer walls together, tend children, flowers, bicycle, bleed, and live my life however the hell I want to. Which right now includes a lot of missing my boyfriend as i admire and check out woman on the street.

Why if you are Man, ie owning a penis, why do you wish to be a Woman? and vice versa?

I dont want this to come off harsh. People are people, and if being the person you are includes having a shaved head or wearing a dress, all the power to you.

I guess i just catagorize people by their bits.

  -Dawn

(I'm giving myself less credit then i have and playing the devils advocate in the hopes of getting a response and an understanding from people who know more then i do.)

I was showing mom pictures of Robyn and Tessa. She said in an annoyed wierd voice "With hair that short i cant tell if its a boy or a girl!" I laughed and said that that was the point

Why does looking like a Woman sometimes make me feel safer, but sometimes makes me feel weaker?

 -Dawn

I didn't know where to post this, but I need to vent... My supposedly bisexual boyfriend of four months is making me miserable. He's completely nasty to me one minute, a sweetheart the next. I haven't gotten him alone for more than five minutes in two weeks. Two. Weeks. And he lives right by me. When I said I missed him and was used to getting more of his time to myself, he said "You can't always get what you want. I gotta go, babe." and left. So I snooped in his livejournal friends page he said he's been hitting random often and chatting with people and every single one of his new friends is a young openly gay boy. And there's nothing wrong with that at all. But I have the feeling I'm playing the fool here. It just hurts so bad to think of letting go it makes me sick. Maggie

it's unfathomable to me how much transphobia is in the world. it's crazy. and really flucking scary. i cant even understand it. how could you not love someone for them, not what gender they are, or what gender they "think" they are? why cant people be whoever they are, not whoever their genitals say they are? why can't people respect that?

• here here. i so agree. you are who you are. its what inside that counts. i get anoyed at people these days. but frankly i cant really blame them. there scaired of the unknowen...

I got in drag for the first time at Miranda's New Year's party, and I loved every minute of it. I put on one of Shippy's skirts, Robyn braided my hair, and Mical made me up, and I looked amazingly beautiful, if I do say so myself. I'm very straight and very male, no confusion about that, but I still like to experiment with the way I look. It was fun to wear my hair that way, and skirts are incredibly comfortable. I had no idea.

In general I don't worry much about gender roles. Not consciously, anyway. I love to do all kinds of things, both those that are considered to be "masculine" and "feminine," and I don't honestly think about it much. I feel very fortunate in my parentage, because my parents have never encouraged or discouraged anything I've done on the basis of my gender. I think my most disturbing gender moments have been the times that I've been sexually harassed by drivers who've mistaken me for a girl. I used to get honked at a lot while I was walking at night, because with my long hair it was hard to tell that I was a guy. It was a little scary, but mostly it just pissed me off. Not at being mistaken for a girl, but just at the idea that people would treat anyone that rudely. One night last October, a middle-aged man came on to me. I mean, he was standing ten feet in front of me and he started flirting with me! Shit! Then he heard my voice and said, "Oh man, I'm sorry! I thought you were a chick just by the way you looked!" Heh. Thanks. Arrrrggghhh.

This has been a random ramble by

So. So so, as (hopefully) most of you know, Tessa and I have been traveling around lately. Due to unforseeable circumstances, we ended up spending three days in Spokane, WA. Spokane.... is not really a super accepting city, and the first couple days we were there we got a lot of weird looks, nothing really negative but enough to make us both feel uncomfortable walking through it at night. So on the third day we tried going as a straight couple. And the freakiest thing is, the looks stopped. Tess (who has short hair now) put on a shirt she had of Mitchell's, tight bra, guy shorts, took out her earrings.... I dressed up as girly as the clothes we had would allow. It was very weird, although cool too.... it wasn't just the looks stopping that made it weird, the weirdest thing was that the way we related to each other and reacted was starting to change, just because of some clothes and a butch walk.... anyway. Strange, strange feeling.

• its crazy how well the whole Butch/Femme thing works...crazy yet awesome.....

http://www.smorg.net/testem/revolution2.html A Genderqueer Primer