Once Upon A Lo Latus

Lotus sighed and rested her forehead on the window. If only Selena had waken her before she had left. She hadn't expected it to be over this quickly; she knew Selena would leave, but she hadn't expected for that to be the end. "So much for wishful thinking," she murmured to herself.

The crickets sung mournfully outside in the grass, and they seemed to be echoing Lotus' heart. She was so in love. What could she do? Write a song said a little voice in her head. Isn't that the most productive thing to do?

"No!" she said out loud. "I just can't. She's gone and I'm nothing. nothing!" She cried bitterly for awhile, but since that wouldn't bring Selena back again, she decided to go take a walk, maybe she could loose herself in the beauty of the June sunset.

The freshly cut grass squelched under Lotus' black leather boots, and the evening was so lovely that she almost forgot her sorrows. She walked and walked, finally ending up at a tiny pond in the middle of the woods. She sat down and looked in the water. By this time it was almost dark, and the stars reflected themselves in the pool like tiny floating candles.

It was then that she saw the nun. What was really scary was that he looked just like Ted.

"what the FUCK???" Lotus nearly jumped out of her skin, and leaped to her feet, holding her hand to her heart.

"Don't be afraid Lotus. You of all people shouldn't be afraid of me." Ted said soothingly, smoothing his habit.

"Ted?" Lotus squeaked.

"Please," Ted said, still soothing, "Call me Sister Ted."

Lotus raised an eyebrow, and cocked her head to the side, looking him up and down. "Ted, you're still dressing in drag? After what Fiona threatened to do to you if you didn't stop?"

Ted shrugged. "Oh pish-posh. What can Fiona do? She's probably off with Boof somewhere."

"Who?" Lotus asked, puzzled. Boof? Wasn't Boof Caleb's alter-ego or something? "You mean Caleb?"

He looked alarmed, and Lotus noticed that his fingers appeared to be trembling.

"You cold?" she asked kindly. "Why don't you come in? I just made a cucumber salad..."

Ted looked like his eyeballs were about to pop out of his head.

"Uh....you ok?" Lotus asked, concerned. "You look a little...wierd. Did I say something wrong?"

"No." Ted said tightly. "You said nothing wrong. Let's go into your house."

Lotus looked like she was about to argue, but graciously flapped her hand in the direction of the house, and started walking next to him. She felt a little wierd about allowing an ex-camper male nun into her house, especially this one, but she wasn't sure how to refuse him.

They walked to her house, and Ted looked at her guitar, nose quivering. "Wanna jam?" Lotus asked sincerely. Ted's brow drew down, and his lips tightened into a thin line. "No." Touchy touchy, thought Lotus. I wonder why he doesn't play guitar anymore. "Did you ever end up putting out that cd, Ted?"

"No."

Big conversationalist. "What happened?"

"I discovered the error of my ways."

Lotus almost snorted out loud, but she kept it to herself. "You mean you found religion?"

"No."

Lotus rolled her eyes, but then noticed that Ted looked a little pale, a little sickly, a little...wierd. "Want something to eat?"

"No."

"Um, ok. Then what do you want, Ted?"

Ted's head jerked up suddenly, his eyes crazed, his eyebrows wiggling strangely. "I want...I want...." he stammered.

Lotus drew back, aghast, just as Ted lunged for her.

"AAAAAIIIIIIIEEEEEEE! All for the Nuns! The mighty Nuns!" Ted shrieked, wrapping his black-habited arms around Lotus' neck. Lotus made a strangeled noise, and struggled to unlock Ted's arms from around her neck, but he must have gotten stronger than he used to be, because she couldn't budge them. They both fell on the floor and would have stayed there for quite awhile, rolling back and forth, Lotus trying to get away, Ted trying to hang on, still whispering from time to time "All for the Nuns! The mighty Nuns!"

"Will you SHUT UP???" Lotus finally said, gasping. "If you're going to hold me hostage on the floor of my own house, will you at least STOP SAYING THAT???"

Just then out of the corner of her eye Lotus saw a black hooded someone who looked suspiciously like a nun run through the doorway and wrench Ted's hands off her neck and drag him out of the room by his wrists. The hooded someone dumped Ted in the trunk of the car under a blaket so no one could hear him screaming "the nuns!!! All for the nuns!!!!" The someone came back to the doorway and raised their finger to their lips and then fled before Lotus could see who it was.

"W-wait!" Lotus cried, picking herself up off the floor, and running to the stairway. She tumbled down the stairs, the person in black only a few yards away, only a few yards out of her grasp. "Please!" Lotus yelled. "Who are you? What's all this with NUNS?"

Suddenly, the black-cloaked figure stopped so suddenly that Lotus ran into them with full force. Slowly, slowly, the person turned around, and Lotus felt fear tremble at the edges of her heart. The person's hood obscured their face, so that all she could see was an ominous black hole. Lotus drew back, trying not to shake with fear. The person raised their hands to the sides of the hood, slowly, slowly sliding it off their head. They whispered "So you really want to know who I am? You really want to know what all this stuff with the Nuns is?"

"Um..." Lotus stammered. "Yeah. Sort of."

The hood fell back. Lotus screamed and dropped to the floor in a faint. Taber smiled, got in the car, and left with Ted still pounding on the trunk to get out.

When Lotus woke up, she felt like she was sitting with her ear pressed to the speakers at a Marilyn Manson concert. She sat up, blinked, and tried to figure out what had just happened.

"Ted...Nuns...Taber...Taber??? What the..." Then she gasped. Taber!!! He was likely to hold Ted hostage, radical-honestying him until he broke him! Lotus didn't particularily like the way that Ted had treated her, but no one deserved to go through that torture!

"I've got to save him!" She murmured, getting to her feet and racing to the phone...

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