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Okay so question... to all y'all sexually active girlies out there who're hip to birth control and all such thingses. what do y'all think of the birth control pill? used it? havent? why? why not? are condoms enough? ...just curious.

• Hmmm.... generally skeptical of medication, but I've used the pill, and think its best to combine pill and condoms... neither is entirely effective.

Julie(lipse's reply:

• Happy sex week / condom week, everyone!

• No single form of birth control is enough, although it's important to use condoms, since they protect against disease. But to meand this is of course a personal decisionThe Pill simply isn't worth the risks that it still entails... higher risks of breast and cervical cancer, diabetes, infertility, birth defects, and more. These risks are fairly low (as long as you don't smoke, aren't very much overweight, are under 35, do not have family history of cancer or diabetes, etc.), but they are also very real. If you want to learn about the early problems with the pill and the birth of the women's health movement, look for a copy of Barbara Seaman's "The Doctors' Case Against the Pill." Look for the updated 25^th anniversary edition. Remember that we've already got a LOT more estrogens in our daily environments than we should have.

• The Pill is NOT the most effective form of birth control, and it has its own inconveniences: it has to be taken at the same time every day (especially the mini-pill: if you're even a few hours off, you're much more likely to get pregnant); it has to be taken for 3 months before you start having intercourse, you have to abstain or use barrier methods well for at least 6 months after you go off the pill; it's expensive if your insurance doesn't cover it, and *please* remember that you still need to protect yourself against STDs!!! Condoms, condoms, condoms!!!! Also remember that if you're on The Pill, it is not effective when you're also on antibiotics! Use other forms of protection or abstain from intercourse (if you're sick enough to be on antibiotics, it's probably just as well).

• BC Pills work great for some women, including some good friends of mine (although I know at least two people who have gotten pregnant on them), and they can be a worthwhile part of a birthcontrol plan, just please, do your research! Know what you're on, know how it works, and know what the risks are. Be aware that gynecologists are probably the least knowledgable group of doctors with regards to The Pill's risks, as when problems arise, they usually need to be treated by other doctors and are not reported back to gynos. Does it contain estrogen? If so, it should be less than 35 micrograms if you have any risk factors for blood clots or strokes. Is it a progestin-only mini pill? Don't forget to take it on time! Although it carries some risks and disadvantages, if it's the best way for you to keep from becoming pregnant with a baby that you don't want right now, then taking the pill is a responsible thing to do. 80 million women world-wide use them.

Someone I know is pregnant... another girl I know, was pregnant a year and a half ago, and gave her child up for adoption. How strange it is... what enemies we would make of our reproductive systems... fearing that... fearing we'd become pregant... it seems to me today, that our society encourages girls to be sexually active whle at the same time attacking those who get pregant, for their stupidity, in letting it happen. And I ask... why must we be enemies with ourselves? With our bodies?

• I think I like where you're going, but what exactly was your point? Was it that girls should have sex at a young age and then have the babies that result, or was it that girls shouldn't have sex?
• I don't know where I was going... I guess that's just the start of a ramble that I never really completed. See, I was talking to this friend... a girl I met at college, and I hadn't known till just recently that the year before she came to college, she had a baby. She gave the child up for adoption, and has kept quite quiet about it because of the negative attitude that people have towards girls who have "illegitamate children".. And she was talking about her experience, and I found that fascinating... she talked, for example, about how difficult she finds it dating now, because even though she doesn't have the child now she still feels like that experience was a part of her, and that she can't keep it a secret... but that she still gets dumped for mentioning it. So she's at odds with that part of herself. And then I think of my own life... I think of how scared I would be if I got pregnant, and how I'd almost like to be more sexually active than I am... but I don't want to, because if I was now I'd spend the whole time worrying that I'm doing somethng wrong that either I'm wrong for being sexually active or that I'm going to get pregnant, or get a disease. I don't know. This is all just a ramble. I don't have a point, or a recommendation for others. I just... have my own thoughts and experiences. Christy

Okay! New topic! Let's talk kinky!

what's the difference betweeen Erotic and kinky? Erotic is using a feather. kinky is using the whole chicken

I hate whipped cream, and I don't know why the hell anyone else likes it! Personally, I'd rather lick frosting (especially chocolate!) off someone. It's a little less messy, and it tastes better. Of course if you like messy, than feel free to use that weird runny white stuff eww, I know what you're thinking you horny little brats!!!

The problem with anything sugary is that gals have to be careful not to get any of it *down there*, at risk of a yeast infection... candida loves feeding on sugar. Other than that, I must admit a partiality to choclate sauce.

Well the thought of mixing food products and sex doesn't really excite me, but I might try it some time. I will of course have to get K's impute on the matter. Probably the closest I've come to doing it near food was one time in the pantry at this place I was staying at but that is a completly different story (devilish smile plays across my face and a slight giggle escapes my lips at the memory.)

I don't know about you people but I'm all about hot wax. Maybe a combo of ice and hot wax.. I know that sounds kinda.. werid.. the whole pain/pleasure thing going for it, but I personally think it'd be.. incredibly.. intresting. - Zen (Who hasn't actually TRIED it.. but.. well, has pondered it deeply)

Well I'm sure It'd be a lot more original than being tied up! :) Oh and if you want to do ice, make sure it's dry so it really sticks to the person :P ~Eryn, who has had no experience in this area. really.

• One has to wonder how many people have actually done that - Zen

• The ice would be interesting...hot wax is okay, but just be careful where is pours, nothing hurts more then turning a fun sex session into a body waxing session. -Gennie

• Ooh, I accidentally stumbled onto the sexuality of hot wax last January. I was on my couch with Dawn, and before I kissed her I went around and blew out all the candles in the room, just to be safe. (Candlelit evening, oo la la.) The last one I blew out was on the arm of the couch. It was a very stubborn candle, so I had to lean close to it and give it a good hard whoosh. The wax that had pooled in the bottom splashed onto my upper lip. It hurt like hell at first, but when it cooled off a bit it actually felt kinda nice. I peeled it all off before I kissed Dawn, but I wonder what would've happened had I left it there. Mmmmm... maybe next time. Mitchell

I can see how the hot wax/ice thing could be cool. A lot of what sex is about, I think, is play and sensation... My favorite parts of most of the erotica I've read has been the vivid discriptions of sensory imput usually nothing particularly sexual they often use to "warm the readers mind up." reanna

I like hot wax, but ice cubes are a bit overwhelming. I can deal with ice water though. Has anyone here read Dossie Easton & Catherine Liszt's "The Bottoming Book" and "The Topping Book"? They're wonderfully friendly introductions to BDS in the form of sex as sensation & power play. Very well written. --- You know, I gotta wonder how many of the things that are supposed to be "kinky" or "sexy" are just really stupid, like things they always show in the movies and stuff. I know from experience that passing food in a smooch can be either really disgusting or quite wonderful (depending on the food & other factors). I've heard sex in the water (hottubs, etc) is totally unrealistic and no fun at all, which I can believestrange as it sounds, water is too drying !

• From what I've heard, sex in the water is not just no fun, but unhealthy as it pushes water up inside the girl...
• eeick!!! *winces*

• The problem with water and sex is, it tends to take away the natural lubricants the develop during sex. -Gennie

• That's what's nice about oil based lubricants. I'm all about petroleum jelly in the bathtub. Water can be nice for rougher play too. Things don't always have to be calm and smooth and oiled. Sex on the beach isn't as impractical as it sounds either, though I wouldn't recommend it without a nice blanket and perhaps a bottle of lubricant.

Kinky eh? Not much seems kinky anymore. It seems so exploited by the media, that everything in sex just seems normal. People used to think oral sex was sorta out there, and now...just part of the deal. *laughs* I think what makes some things kinky is that....amount of vunerability people put forth. Taking yourself to a different level of trust with another person. Yeah I have done a few things, people might construe as kinky, but at the same time it is rather interesting. You trust someone else, and they trust you. As for preferences, I am a fan of the chocolate bodypaint! fun stuff, tastes good, and everyone seems to have a good time. Chandeliers [1] just seem silly. -Gennie

[1] Chadeliers?

kinky? i dont know about that. but i had sex tonight with this guy. we arent going out though we are dating. i am kind of freaked out because i dont want to get pregnant and i know condoms arent reliable birth control. i also, i dont know. i hadnt done it before and now look at my situation so send me good vibes. -no name

• hugs* Okay girl... if you have reason to believe that the condom didn't work - if it came off, or if you noticed it leaking after, or there wasn't enough space at the end to collect the semen or you're just really unsure about everything then go talk to your doctor as soon as possible. There is a "morning after" pill that doctors can perscribe up to 72 hours afterwards that can prevent you from getting pregnant. And if you're going to be having sex again, you might want to consider getting on the birthcontrol pill. Being on the pill doesn't mean you have to have sex again, but should give you the extra security if you do decide too.

There... birth control speil done... how are you feeling? It can be weird, can't it, realizing you've "done it"? Things will work out... love yourself... decide each time you do have sex if its what you want... just because you've done it once now with this guy doesn't mean you have to again, although you could choose to. Just make sure its still a choice, I mean.